Tango on the Costa del Salford

Herman Eccles was a policeman,
Herman nicked them all,
But Tuesday evenings saw him flying
To the Salford Hall.
Herman lived to dance the Tango,
Herman made them fly,
Villains, Peons, Whores and Brigands,
Herman made them cry:
“Throw me down upon the dance floor,
Throw me to the sky,
Beat me, treat me,
Eat me, seat me,
Make me want to die!”

One night Herman met a lady,
A PC known as Sue,
She twisted to his hooks and gauchos,
Knew his rhythm too.
Herman knew his heart was lost to her,
Knew it like a sigh,
Threw her to the floor and told her,
“Be mine or let me die!”
Sue wiped down her sweaty biceps,
Said: “My answer’s yes!”
Then trussed him up with silver handcuffs,
Held him to her chest.
“Love me, shove me,
Beat me, eat me,
Herman, make me cry,
Herman we shall dance together,
Till the day we die!”

Copper Bottomed

A tango enthusiast finds all Salford falls adoringly at his feet.


Love Songs


Max Scratchmann

Copyright © Max Scratchmann. All Rights Reserved