Love Songs

Max's Love Songs include long languid love poems in ballad form and nonsense verse on a romantic theme. Some of the poems are funny, others obliquely humorous, whimsical or deliberately obtuse. Those unfamiliar with Max's poetry or looking for conventional funny love poems would be well advised to first read Max's Funny Poems about Love, before revisiting the exotic delights of the Love Songs.

The Filing Clerk’s Love Song

A humorous confection about a gently smoldering office romance, which has more than its fair share of culinary analogies.

Last Tango In Swanage

A fantasy poem about a dance hall extravaganza in which all Swanage life is laid bare here.

The Wombat’s Valentine

A nonsensical poem in Max's inimitable style which it would take a braver man than I to try and unravel.

A Baker’s Love Song

It's a wonderfully witty Betjemen parody, but equally enjoyable as a piece of unabashed nonsense.

The Love Song of the Jibbernob

If you don;t know what a Jibbernob is, I not sure that reading the poem will enlighten you.

Pre-Raphaelite Love Song

A poem which asks more questions than it answers, which is surely the defining feature of a really good nonsense poem.

The Love Song of the Anne Summers Rep

Prepare for a sharp change in tone, as The Love Song of the Anne Summers Rep is an initially dirty poem which builds to a touchingly romantic conclusion.

I Love Lucy in the House of Wax

The opening line, Newspaper taxis of yellow and green, turtles and penguins in silk, will confirm that we're once again entering the wonderful world of nonsense verse where your guess is as good as mine.

Tango on the Costa del Salford

If you found Last Tango In Swanage a little pedestrian, prepare yourself for the exploits of a tango-loving Salford policeman.

The Love Song of Edgar Allen Poe

It was a close run thing whether to include The Love Song of Edgar Allen Poe with the Love Songs (the title suggests I made the right choice) or funny literary poems (the poem will appeal more to Poe-lovers than romantics).

A Fishy Love Story

More toying with established literary masterpieces in the pursuit of whimsy,

Domestic Bliss

A cross between a nonsense tale and a public service poem form the Marriage Guidance Council (now called Relate, or more likely Relate!)

The Clerk and the Tea Lady

If you enjoyed The Filing Clerk’s Love Song, you'll find further biscuit related-romance in this cream cracker of a poem.

An Old Love Song

A tragicomic poem about love in old age, which may harbour a rather filthy undercurrent, but I can't quite put my finger on it.